by Liz | Oct 26, 2008 | main
Today was our fall picnic/festival complete with only one mass instead of 2 english + 1 spanish. These are always uplifting events. They also usually include at least one misstep that will bring a smile for weeks to come. Sometimes it is a missed cue at mass – bilingual masses are never quite perfect. Sometimes it is the vision of a blindfolded adult swinging wildly at a pinata (which is nowhere near the swing).
But today’s memory comes from the second reading at mass: A reading from the First Letter of Paul to the Theologians… oops… Thessalonians. That slip will keep me smiling for a long time to come.
I’ll be waiting on a reading from Paul’s second letter to the Theologians.
by Liz | Oct 26, 2008 | main
I’m sure we have all made mistakes. We have all exhibited some form of at least mildly unacceptable behaviour at some time in our lives. It’s a part of the learning process. However, when someone steps far outside the boundaries of acceptable behaviour and commits acts that are immoral/illegal then something must me done. Or at least we feel something must be done.
Recently, I watched from afar as someone is being erased. That’s one of the ways we cope with a broken person – someone who needs to be accountable, and at the same time needs healing. We erase them. We remove all references to them. We start the process of making them invisible. The name and the picture are removed from printed material or from a website. Connections are broken. Rooms are cleaned out. Personnel replaced. Or at a family level, the photos may have to be removed from albums and destroyed.
These actions are often needed as a part of a healing process for those who were damaged by the offender’s actions. It’s not all bad. It’s a way of moving forward and not staying focussed on the hurt. It’s probably even a part of the the process of forgiving.
I’ve heard it explained that being in “sin” is the state of being separated – separated from God. Being erased is a rather vivid image of being separated in a human sense. I’m glad that Scripture seems to tell me that God will not erase me. That there is hope – that the prodigal child can return home. I pray never to be erased from a community or a family. And I pray for healing for both those who must do the erasing, and the ones who are erased.
by Liz | Oct 15, 2008 | main
Yesterday a colleague and I were walking back from a meeting when I stepped on a very hard, round acorn on the sidewalk. Much like stepping on a marble… I felt my ankle twist, I fought for my balance, and then hit the sidewalk pretty hard. The result was a skinned knee and a scraped elbow. Oh, and not a little embarrassment. After checking that there was nothing truly wrong, I got back to my feet. My friend picked up my tea from the sidewalk, and then, once he knew I was OK, he chuckled. I had slammed to the sidewalk without spilling my drink or losing my cigarette.
I have to think – what is wrong with this picture? I’m scraped up and my ankle is a bit sore, but my drink and my smoke are in fine shape. Somehow, I think I’m too attached to caffeine and nicoteine. After all, in the flash of the moment of falling, that’s what I protected.
It’s happened before. I’ve been shown what I care most about. When I was accompanied in to my house that had burned the night before, I recall that the first thing that popped out was — “My guitar is in there!” Granted, I knew that my family was unharmed, so that wasn’t an issue. But, of all the items that had been in the house, the first thing that raced to the front of my “concern line” was my guitar. And the same seems to have been true when I took a tumble in the choir loft at church which resulted in a swollen knee, but a completely unscathed guitar.
I take some comfort in the realization that these moments of light also reflect that I never questioned God’s love for me. I never cursed (and believe me, I am capable of that). But, it’s interesting to know what things I cling to a protect. Are these objects and habits a part of my identity? It seems so.
And so, I have some work to do. It’s not comfortable to think that a cigarette and a glass of tea might be more important than a kneecap or an elbow.
Thank God that with my unstable balance and my seemingly weak ankle, I’ve learned to fall gracefully. I just hope I’ve not learned to fall from grace.
by Liz | Sep 28, 2008 | main
Do you know the term “switchback”? or maybe the sailing term “tacking.” – If I’m not mistaken, both refer to making progress by taking a zigzag sort of course – progress is made, but there’s an awful lot of switching direction. Rather like my take on today’s gospel…
Jesus talks about the two sons – the Father tells both of them what he wants them to do. The first one says “no way!” but later decides to go ahead and do his father’s will. The second says “Yes! certainly.” and then go on his merry way without doing anything.
It’s no good to try to figure out which of these children I am. I am both. In times of growing, I can hear a call and it hits so close to home that I turn and say “no way! I can’t do that. I won’t do that.” But, it eats at me, and I come around. Other times, I feel so interested, and say “yes!” and then I fail to do anything.
I am a convert to the Catholic Church. Now, I’ve been a Catholic Christian for far longer than I was a protestant Christian, but the path that got me here was the one of the older (?) or first brother from the gospel. I was sitting on a hill, in front of a fig tree near the Catholic Student Center when it occurred to me that I was to join this community. “Not me, God. You have the wrong person.” The very idea rocked my soul to the core. Good Calvinist Christians do not join the Catholic Church. No way.
As time passed, the idea wouldn’t leave me. I finally gave up fighting the request and began to go through the preparations to join the church. Funny, I went through the classes no less than 2 full rounds. And, in the end, I had to convince the priests and sisters that I was serious. I understand their hesitation – and they were right to try to make sure that I was serious. The road has not always been smooth, but, after the initial “No” I found I had to reconsider and say “Yes.”
The times when I am the second son are many and not so dramatic. And, right now, I am not even willing to address some of them in an open forum. But, the “Yes” with no follow-up happens more often than I would like.
This journey is one of switchbacks and tacking. It is good to know that God is always calling. It is good to know that the Spirit is there as the wind in my sails, even when I have to tack for a great distance. It is good to remember that “yes” can happen even after the initial turn-down and wise to remember that just because I say “yes” the task is not yet accomplished.
by Liz | Sep 27, 2008 | main
Today I join my Vincentian brothers and sisters in celebrating the feast of St. Vincent de Paul.
My thoughts too jumbled to write much about how the life of this 17th century French priest has shaped my understanding of God’s love and how to live in response to that. He recognized the value of women and their contributions. He taught clergy to work with laity. He believed that action was necessary, but must be preceded by prayer and meditation. He used the tools of his day to communicate with others. He was inspired by the poor to work for and with the poor.
Timeless themes in my view. Practical ideas of how to live the Gospel.
And so I thank God, not only for Vincent’s life, but for the many who live out this Charism – especially those who are closest to me and walk parts of this journey with me.
More on Vincent de Paul, the Vincentian Charism and the many people and groups that have grown out of this Charism is available in the Vincentian Encyclopedia.
