by Liz | Feb 13, 2010 | main
In her post this morning, Maintaining Wide Boundaries, Susan reflects on the views of an Episcopal bishop on the belief that it is better to have a few heretics in church than to push people out. The goal is to keep people in dialogue and therefore keep alive the possibility of conversion and allow God’s love to work. And that conversion, to me, seems to be something that can happen on either or both sides of disagreement.
In the past, I have felt “pushed out.” In reality, I did move from one parish to another by my choice, but that choice was tempered by a strong, painful sense of being pushed to the door and having it held open for me. It was driven by a need to find a home where I felt welcomed, even when I wasn’t necessarily agreed with. In the long run, it was “a good thing” — and my new home opened many doors and paved the way for a deeper understanding of God’s love. Eventually, with this support, I could make my peace with the other community. I could be transformed and forgive. It took a long time, but seldom, it seems does real conversion happen in an instant. It is a process.
And process is what I see the Bishop talking about. I have watched and listened as members of my family, who are members of the Episcopal Church, have made their own way through the upheavals in their church. I am always impressed when I see them love their church, even when they are concerned. I see them struggle to understand the way that others live out their faith. They love their community, warts and all. They are transformed in their own struggle.
Thanks Susan — I needed to read this reflection this morning.
by Liz | Feb 11, 2010 | main
Todays gospel (Mark 7:24-30) has always bothered me. It relates the story of a gentile woman, a mother, who begs Jesus to banish the unclean spirit from her daughter. And Jesus answers, initially, that it’s not right to give the food for the children to the dogs. After she pursues the request, stating that even the dogs get to eat the crumbs that fall at the children’s feet, he sends her on her way with the child having been healed.
This just doesn’t fit into my image of Jesus or God. Sorry. I know that God doesn’t have to fit my image, but really – this just strikes me as so far off the mark. Is it just showing that Jesus, too, was having to grow in understanding of God’s Love? Is it there to remind us that each one has the responsibility to point out truth to the powers that be? I don’t know.
What I do know is that it eats at me. This vignette forces me to look beyond simply because it seems so very wrong and out of place. Hence, I do ponder the idea that it could be illustration that everyone, even the Christ, must grow in God’s Love — that we don’t start with the full picture, and probably never have the full picture. I ponder whether it is meant [at least for me] as a reminder that instruction and insight can come from the most unexpected quarter. This woman was an outsider, a stranger, not one of the blessed, ordained bearers of Truth. And yet, she proclaims Truth – maybe from wisdom, maybe from desperation, maybe from selfishness. But, she fights for what she knows to be needed and knows to be True. And her child is saved.
I live in hope that I will both listen and speak when I know it has to be done.
by Liz | Feb 8, 2010 | main
Yesterday’s readings (5th Sunday of Ordinary Time, Isaiah 6:1-2.3-8, First Corinthians 15:1-11, Luke 5:1-11) reinforced for me the understanding that God takes the first step. Fr. Jack wandered into the memories, for Cradle Catholics, of confession as a child: 7 year old knew they were sinners – Sister told them so. I didn’t have this experience – but as a child in calvinist protestant tradition, I certainly got the message that if you did something wrong, God would get you. It has taken me a whole lot of growth to understand that it is entirely possible to look at someone who is a total mess, who has made a real hash of life, and still feel in the bottom of my heart – ” I love you!” and offer the words, hug and smile to make that understood.
As I listened to the readings, and the homily, I just kept hearing that the characters (Isaiah, Paul, Peter and his buddies) only really understood how far off the mark they were until God/Jesus reached out and touched them first. Especially Isaiah and Paul were fine until they found themselves face to face with the Ultimate Reality. Both pull back — stay away! I’m not good enough! and God says – “I love you. Now, go out and tell the world!”
Br. David Steindl-Rast (Gratefulness.org) would prefer to use the terms “belonging” and “separation” instead of “salvation” and “sin.” I quite agree. When we see perfection, we realize our imperfections – and our separation. Sinfulness. Then, and maybe only then, can we be drawn into belonging and wholeness. It’s a bit like a Twelve Step program: before you even get to step 1, you have to somehow be aware that there is a different way to live.
It’s not enough to stop with the realization that life can be different. It’s easy to be paralyzed by that, true. But, God calls me to accept the Love and myself, and move on – set out on the road – get on with a mission. Use it or lose it!
by Liz | Feb 1, 2010 | main
Yesterday I noticed that a single friend was attired in a clothing with an impending “wardrobe failure.” That would be a seam by a pocket that was coming loose. Not something he had noticed, not essential to existence, by any means. I poked fun at him saying he “needed a wife.” That’s not an option for him, and he responded that he simply needed someone to cook and sew.
Maybe, it’s more a matter of needing a “keeper.” We all need one – I do, for sure. You know, someone to function as wife/mother to look at use lovingly before we face the world each day and say – “Are you wearing that?” (or “You’re not going out like that, are you!?” Someone to tuck in tags, check for rips and tears, someone to see us clearly where we are.
Guess that’s a bit of what God does for me, if I take the time in the morning to pray and be quiet. If I am open to his/her gaze she will show me the things that need attention. And it will be done in a loving way… If you ware going out into the world, at least know that the tag might be hanging out, or the shoes scuffed, the temper a bit on edge. Someone to remind me that I am loved.
De Colores!
by Liz | Jan 31, 2010 | main
A couple of weeks ago, a friend and I were talking and he mentioned something he had read or heard about the difficulties of understanding the various ways of expressing love. Some talk, some do. It seems I’m married to a “do-er” as it were. I’ve tried watching carefully for the past week of two to see if I can understand this. Interesting trial.
He does. He went to Walmart for something, and while there, hunted down a cable I needed for my iPod so that I could use it in the car — 2 cables, it turned out. In the past, he bought me a 12-string guitar for my birthday (one I had looked at, played and liked very much.) He calls on his way home from school (he’s a teacher so he’s off earlier than I) to see if there is anything needed at the store. There are more things that he does. Many more.
This is not my preferred communication method. It’s hard to see it. It requires work on my part to pay attention enough to see that this is his way of caring. I am much more in tune to to talking, sharing, emotion. That I understand that without so much work. But, I think this might be impossible for him.
This weekend the second reading for mass proclaims that love is the most important. Perhaps it is not only important to love, but also important to try to understand and accept the sometimes cryptic way others attempt to love us.
